By His Grace

We Reap What We Sow

Posted on: March 11, 2012

For we must all stand before Christ to be judged.  We will each receive whatever we deserve for the good or evil we have done in our bodies. (2 Corinthians 5:10)

I am having to deal with a consequence from my past actions.  God’s Word tells us that if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  I am forgiven, I am cleansed for my past wrong.  God loves me and He is faithful.  Where would I be without His amazing love?  Where would I be without His amazing grace and mercy?  To answer that would be to say that I would not be sitting and writing this post for my blog.  I would not be where I am sitting at this very minute.  God is my everything and without Him I am nothing.  I know that now.

I like to refer to this time in my life as the “second half of my life”.  The first half of my life had many joys and many sorrows.  The second half of my life is just now beginning.  I am literally starting over in life.  That can be exciting at times, but I’m a worry wart and I have a lot of fear.  These are the current things in my life that God is healing me from.  It takes time.  So long as I am obedient to His Word, the worry and fear will disappear.  God’s Word says it happens, so I believe it.

I have wanted to go into nursing for a long time.  I love helping people.  I would rather go without if it meant it could help someone in need.  I want to bring value to a persons life.   I want them to know they are loved and they matter.  This is an attitude totally opposite of how I once lived my life.  Living the life of an addict consists of what I want, when I want and how I want it.  By the grace of God, I’m not living my life like that anymore.  But I have a problem.

I am not able to go into this field because of a particular charge on my record.  It’s a charge that cannot be expunged and will follow me my whole life.  I had a job offer the other day that I had to turn down because I know the background check will come back with a violation.  It doesn’t matter that I turned my life around, according to the state of Florida, I cannot work in any type of caregiving field.  I was devastated.

So here I am again.  Going through a test.  I am so tired of tests!!   But it’s of my own doing.  I am reaping what I sowed.  It’s a hard lesson.  Peter writes a wonderful passage in 2 Peter 1:5-8:

“So make every effort to apply the benefits of these promises to your life.  Then your faith will produce a life of moral excellence.  A life of moral excellence leads to knowing God better.  Knowing God leads to self-control.  Self-control leads to patient endurance and patient endurance leads to godliness.  Godliness leads to love for other Christians, and finally you will become productive and useful in your knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.”

I want to be productive and useful in some way.  I’m not able to do it in the manner I wanted but I have to put my faith and trust in Him that He will make all things come together for good.  It’s what God wants now, not what I want.  I just hope I can pass the test this time.

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20 Responses to "We Reap What We Sow"

Proverbs 3:5&6 says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; lean not unto your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths”. Putting all of my trust in God and giving Him total control of my life was one of the hardest things I have ever done. But it was also the smartest choice I have ever made, and it has been so worth it! God’s way is always the best way, even though at times we may not see it or understand it. Let Him lift up your heart and spirit, keep your focus on Him and your faith in Him. He will guide you to where you are needed, for His honor and glory. Thank you for sharing and may God bless you richly and keep you in His loving arms forever!

Thank you for the kind words, they are much appreciated. Many blessings to you! 🙂

I believe that God will accomplish His purposes in and through you. His wisdom is multi-faceted, and He has lots of ways to accomplish what He wants and is never hindered by our past.
God is indeed using all of this for good (Romans 8:28). One day as I read that verse, I also read verse 29 which I understood to mean that it’s our destiny to be conformed to the image of Christ. I don’t know all the good God accomplishes in our struggles (and even failures), but one of the good things is to change us more into the image of Christ. God is using you through your blog, and I’m sure He has greater things in store as you faithfully take one step at a time with Him. May you sense His presence close today.
Tricia

Thank you for the kind and encouraging words, Tricia. Many blessings to you today too!

My husband has the same issues with jobs. His past is his past but when a job requires a background check, he always is turned down. It’s heart breaking, he too has turned his life around but, still the past is there and keeps coming back. He was hired for two jobs went and started training to have them “find out” and terminate him. Not only is it hurtful to his heart but he is then embarrassed for telling people that he got the job to begin with, because no matter what they will ask eventually. Just know you are not alone! God can use you the way He wants in the job He wants. Hubby still hasn’t been able to find a job, the economy doesn’t help either. Patiently wait on the Lord though Sister, he never puts you on the wrong path. Hugs!

Thank you so much for telling me this. I know what your husband is going through. Yes, it’s nice to know I’m not alone and that he is staying sober and patiently enduring just how I am. I keep telling myself today to not be discouraged. Please tell your husband the same. He is blessed to have a supportive wife like you. Thanks again and God bless!

Praying for you Michele and know that God has a plan. Your testimony here is a huge help to many so keep it up and keep seeking. God will help you help others and He can show new ways and new avenues for you to use your gifts. God knows the way. We do not have to be certified by man to be certified. LORD, please open a clear door for Michele as You know she wants to serve You and Your children. Show the open doors to her and fill her with Your hope, Your expectation and Your joy. You know all of our pasts and all of our consequences yet Your grace and Your love guide us to Your glory. LORD, I join Michele in crying out to You for guidance and provision. Use Michele as Your vessel to give love, hope and joy to those in need. We love You LORD. Amen

Just keep moving forward knowing God has gone before you to prepare the way. I look forward to hearing from you about the doors He opens for you. Blessings my sister!

Thank you for the prayer. Your so kind. Many blessings to you Tom!

I truly enjoy this post my friend, I know you can help people by doing what you do with your blogging, as well as whatever God has plans for you. Sorry you not able to do nursing. God Bless 🙂

The State of Florida is not the final word, Jesus is. Miricles happen, laws change, mountains move. I pray that the Truth of Christ intervene in your situation. It is not over.

Perry, you’re comment brought a big smile to my face. Thank you for that. Many blessings to you!

God is truly moving in you. Wonderful blog today!

Thank you! In spite of it all, I actually have had a really good day today. God bless!

Dear Michele,

There are so many ways to care without having to get near addicting agents. Those are the ways you need to find. As I read a blog like http://www.addingjoyandlaughter.blogspot.com, I know there is a need for caring people everywhere. You just need to keep putting one foot in front of the other — living and moving forward. You will find your way. As the woman above so aptly said, “Prepare to be amazed!”

Hugs,
Dawn

Thank you Dawn and God bless!

Hi Michele,

I’m so sorry to hear that nursing is a closed door to you. But that can only mean that God has something better in mind.

When I read this my first thought was what about some sort of outreach to the homeless? Or, perhaps even better, how about a Christian outreach to drug addicts?

I once knew a person that opened a food kitchen for the homeless in his city, and ran the place himself.

The important thing of course is to wait on the Lord and follow His leading.

God bless!

Thanks John. An outreach is a really good idea. Many blessings to you!

Trust Him – He has a plan for you – a plan not according to your will but His
Prepare to be amazed
God Bless

Thank you sister! God bless!

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A little about me........my name is Michele and I am a born-again Christian. I was saved as a teenager and graduated from a Christian high school. I am a mother of one son who is the world to me. Despite my upbringing, later in life I fell into a life of self destruction which led me down many dark paths. I am a recovering addict and alcoholic and I have a great passion for Christ and His amazing power to heal even the worst cases. I am living proof of the miracle of God's power to change your life and way of thinking. Nothing is impossible with God.

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